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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

GIFTS

by sannah handoz

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1.
oh, i used to wanna go to a place where i could live forever and a lifetime, on my own oh, take me to the place, where nobody sees my face beneath the trees and covered up with stone oh, i wanna melt away like an ice cube in the desert absorbed into the ground beneath my feet still, my face is sopping wet can i light my cigarette before the coals behind your eyes go dim and cold? and i'm not going anywhere at all i lost me in the summer will i lose you in the fall? is it hard to find the time for girls who never speak in rhyme? if i forgot your favorite words, would you still be mine? oh, i used to wanna fly you're the apple of my eye can you tell me where your love for me has gone? still my face is sopping wet and i light my cigarette but the coals behind your eyes are dim and worn every freezing, wasted night has me searching for the light but i think that ill be there before the dawn dawn
2.
broken heart 03:22
my heart is broken i can't deny you've up and left my life now, all there is is but a sigh i've got to wake up it's past my time if i can't find a place to live, i think i'd rather die and all the animals in the neighborhood they hear me staying up all night just to cry i want to feed them at half past nine when all the possums and their mamas crawl down my big fat pine but there is nothing in the world that i'd rather see in front of me today i long to hold you and call you darling my little starling how i wish to see your face...
3.
home 02:00
the house you grew up in foreclosed the answer to your question no one knows for if you look inside yourself you won't find a thing but still, the warm wind blows standing on tippy-toes to peek over the fence you jumped to kiss her you jumped to touch her and now you jump to leave her
4.
scary things 01:43
i go to sleep every night in an empty room nowhere for the roaches to hide beetles and bedbugs all over the walls mosquitoes make nests in my sides im ruining every good thing that i love it's all 'cause im losing my mind well i snapped and i spit and i fell in your pit and i screamed that i swear I'm alright when i'm choking myself in the early dawn i think it'd be easier to breathe so in i inhale, but the air's gone stale, no wonder you're ready to leave running alone when the moon is high, i pray to get taken away scary man in a bush trade your shove for my push but i always get home okay too many scary things to think about the list is longer than me will i trip on my shadow? will the dog get out? will they bury me under a tree? too many things to feel nervous about and you're the greatest of them all will they miss my embrace or my beautiful face? is the love of my life leaving me?
5.
dumb dog 02:45
dumb dog tell me why you shiver down your spine dumb dog tell me what's been running round your mind i sigh for, there is nothing left your ears are going deaf and your feet drag your skin is ragged; coat's bad but still, your tail wags your jaws reveal a smile i start to cry dumb dog tell me where your sisters lie dumb dog i wish you had an alibi but for now good-by
6.
oh, wow oh, i can't believe my eyes! oh, imagine my surprise to bury you under the bridge with the chugging train and the pouring rain oh, imagine my surprise to see you lying there arms crossed, laying on your side and you looked just like a zombie you had me really scared you looked like a dead guy imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise
7.
every time you speak my name i grit my teeth and rue the day i drink until i feel no pain and i wish to bury you with the parts of me you've touched for i can own them no longer they're covered in bad blood but don't you love that? do you remember the look on my face? my look of surprise? imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise imagine my surprise
8.
i did it!!!! 02:57
here i am, at the end of the year! i did my very best. i want you to fear me so it hurts a little less... and all my eyelash-wishes all my candles, coins, and dandelions, i asked you god, i asked for the same thing every time and i wish i could forget you instead of feeling far away i want you to hurt me i want you to hate me it's all over! it's all over! thank god, it's the end this isn't what i wanted, but i promise, you'll always be my friend it's all over! it's all over! thank god, it's the end this isn't what i wanted, but i promise, you'll always be my, always be my i want to ask my father please who is it that i fear? but who's my father? and what is he doing here? lately, i've been feeling pretty far away from you i pray for dominica deus ex machina and if i'm really your favorite thing to hold and touch and bribe could you possibly imagine what will separate our lives? it's all over! it's all over! thank god, it's the end this isn't what i wanted, but i promise, you'll always be my friend. it's all over! it's all over! thank god, it's the end this isn't what i wanted, but i promise, you'll always be my, always be my yyyyyyy

about

an audible documentation of my sentiments from august to february

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released May 21, 2017

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sannah handoz Lafayette, Louisiana

this is an archived solo project created by me, hannah sandoz - find my current project(s) here:

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